Sometimes parenting feels like a rerun of a TV show I already watched.
But more often, the themes are similar, but the stories are quite different. And the way God speaks to me about those stories is also different. When I struggled with algebra, God spoke to me and led me through the minefield. When my children struggled with algebra, God reminded me of my own experience and of the principles that should lead to success—but He did not step into my life and lead me the way He did when it was MY story.
God works differently in the lives of parents. He reminds us of our own experiences, and of wisdom and truths that will guide our children. But parenting is a bit like coaching—we are not on the field, but on the sideline. We offer advice, but we cannot play the game.
This makes for an interesting experience for parents in the Bible. When Joseph had dreams that his father did not approve of, Jacob rebuked his son. Joseph’s brothers were angry and jealous, but his father “kept the matter in mind” Genesis 37:11. Even though Jacob was offended by his son’s dreams, the Bible says the father kept the matter in mind. In other words, Jacob knew that some dreams come from God, and he could not ignore his son’s two dreams. Somewhere in the mind of this parent was an openness to the ways of God and the mystery of an unknown future. Rather than ignore the matter and forget the dreams, Dad “kept the matter in mind.” Years later, those dreams would be fulfilled, and the favorite son that Jacob had mourned as dead for twenty years would turn out to be alive and one of the two most powerful men on earth. I believe keeping the matter in mind gave Jacob a glimmer of hope during the dark years of mourning for the son he thought was dead.
The Bible uses the same phrase to describe Mary’s reaction to some events in the life of Jesus. After the shepherds reported what the angels had said to them, Mary “pondered” or “treasured” these things in her heart. That is, she “kept them in mind.” And when her twelve-year-old son astonished the temple priests with his understanding, she “treasured these things in her heart.” Mary did not draw conclusions—she did not assume she had all the answers, but she knew she had witnessed something important and she stored it away in her memory. Like Jacob, she would keep the matter in mind, knowing that someday God would give her greater understanding. Similarly, I treasure a handful of memories of events in my kids’ lives that may or may not have come from God. One day, I will know.
The phrase is used one other time in the Bible. In Daniel 7:28, Daniel reports he had a troubling dream. He knew the dream came from God, but he did not understand it. Yet, he refused to dismiss it. Instead, “his thoughts terrified him and his face turned pale, but he KEPT THE MATTER IN MIND” Daniel 7:28.
Sometimes, that is all a parent can do. We watch what God is doing, we pray for understanding, and we keep the matter in mind, knowing that He will reveal more when He is ready.
Dear God, when we do not understand, remind us to pray and to keep the matter in mind. Never let us ignore things we do not understand. But help us to pay attention as you give us greater wisdom.
ΑΩ
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