Why did God command His people “not to marry foreign women”? Because He knew such a marriage would weaken their convictions and lead to compromise. The New Testament says “do not be unequally yoked.” The image is similar to putting a horse and a donkey under the same harness—such arrangements do not work well, and make for difficult marriages because the two disagree on such important matters.
But more importantly, being married to a nonbeliever will often cause you and your kids to remain more distant from Christ.
When Ezra, “an expert in the law of God,” learns how many Israelites have taken foreign (unbelieving) wives, he is overcome with grief:
“I tore my tunic and robe, and pulled out some of the hair from my head and beard, and sat down devastated…. I sat devastated until the evening offering. At the evening offering, I got up from my humiliation with my tunic and robe torn. Then I fell on my knees and spread out my hands to Yahweh my God” Ezra 9:3,5-6.
Ezra then prayed for days, fasted, and what did the people do? They rounded up the foreign wives and sent them home. They were divorced and deported! Imagine the grief and heartbreak. Obeying God is not always easy.
The New Testament offers a different response—stay married and try to influence/convert the lost spouse—but note how seriously God takes the problem. He really, really means it when He says, “do not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever.” It usually will bring you down before it brings them up.
Or as my Aunt Addie used to say, “never date someone you could not marry.” If they do not share your faith, don’t let yourself fall in love. Too many problems—it will probably never work out, and when you are parenting, you will need and crave all the Christian and godly influence you can get for your kids. Be careful with whom you choose to build a life.
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Household Words: 