Bittersweet: Joy During Pain.

“Bittersweet” indicates the odd mix of pain and joy. The death of a loved one may be bitter, but if death follows a long illness, the grieving sometimes consider it sweet that the suffering is over. 

God can bring sweet satisfaction during suffering.  Just ask the persecuted. They sometimes experience an intimacy with God they might never have known otherwise.  Sometimes God is so merciful.

In the Psalms, David complained about his many problems, but he always seemed to find something positive too, a silver lining.  Can you do that?  I find that—like David—WRITING ABOUT PROBLEMS forces me to find a positive way to look at things.  Here are some lines David wrote while he was in the middle of great suffering.  The first is a verse that reminds me of the quarantine we experienced during the COVID-19 pandemic:

“May the Lord be praised, for He has wonderfully shown His faithful love to me in a city under siege” Psalm 31:21.

Others:

“I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears” Ps. 34:4.

“Taste and see that the Lord is good. How happy is the man who takes refuge in Him” Ps. 34:8

“The Lord is near the brokenhearted. He saves those who are crushed in spirit. Many adversities come to the one who is righteous, but the Lord delivers him from them all” Ps. 34:18-19.

“I am like a flourishing olive tree in the house of God. I trust in God’s faithful love forever and ever” Ps. 52:8.

When I began writing in a journal as a young man, complaining about each day’s problems, I ended up giving myself good advice and finding a positive way to look at those problems—probably because the act of putting my thoughts down on paper made me embarrassed that someone might read it and see me handling things badly.  (My fear of appearing self-pitying may seem a poor motive for making good choices–but it worked!) Good choices are always worth it. Journaling helped me to be more like David, finding a positive way to look at my problems. I recommend it!

God, remind us every day to find something good in every problem.

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He Sticks Closer Than a Brother.

Proverbs 18:24 says “there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Can you imagine being betrayed by a brother? It happens sometimes. But if even a brother might betray you, a parent never would, right?

Wrong.

Parents fail children sometimes. Sometimes parents are foolish, immature, or addicted. Other times, parents are hurt by a child, wounded so deeply they decide to cut all ties to protect their “mental health” or whatever. And those situations are horribly sad.

In Psalm 27, David remembers that God not only sticks closer than a brother, but God sticks closer than a parent. Do you realize that? Have you ever thought about it? Your parents may fail you. But God will never fail you.

“Do not leave or abandon me, God of my salvation. Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord cares for me. Because of my adversaries, show me Your Way, Lord, and lead me on a level path.” Psalm 27:9-11.

David knows that even his parents might let him down, but God will never let him down. Do you know that? Do you really believe it?

No matter what happens in your life, no matter how deeply a brother or sister may hurt you, no matter how badly you might feel abandoned by your parents, God will never leave you or abandon you.

The Lord cares for you. And even though you have enemies, God will show you HIS WAY, and lead you on a level path.

Pray. God, please draw me close to You. Fill me with confidence in You, and with assurance that You will never leave me, no matter what people might do. Make me faithful to You. Make me someone who would NEVER abandon God. Make me someone who always wants You to show me Your Way. Lead me on Your level path. Help me to love you more than I love my siblings or my parents. Make me faithful and obedient to You.

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The 911 Psalm.

TV preachers love to shout lines from Psalm 91:

“Though a thousand fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand, the pestilence shall not reach you”—DID YOU HEAR THAT, BROTHERS AND SISTERS?— “the pestilence shall not reach you!” Psalm 91:7.

They will apply this verse to anything—cancer, heart attacks, etc.,—and they scream “IT SHALL NOT REACH YOU!”  When I hear that, I always ask ‘how do you know’?  And I don’t lack faith. FAITH is one of my gifts.  I never have doubts about God.  But I do have doubts when a preacher tries to convince me I will never get sick. After all, God said Adam’s race would die—and we all do, even preachers.

So is Psalm 91:7 false? No.  But there is a better way to interpret it.   

Now it is POSSIBLE God will give you a verse like this as a promise for a certain situation.  But in such a case, you need to hear the voice of God in your heart providing CONFIRMATION.  You can’t just read a verse and decide it has some meaning for your circumstances today.  But if while you read, the Holy Spirit tells you the promise is for you, THEN you can stand on that.

Something tells me Marcus Lamb probably quoted Psalm 91 when he preached against COVID vaccines.  And he died of COVID.  If he claimed verse 7 meant the pestilence of COVID would not touch him, he interpreted the scripture wrongly. You know who else interpreted Psalm 91 wrongly?  Satan!  He tempted Jesus with verses 11-12: “He will give his angels charge over you, lest you strike your foot against a stone.”  Jesus rebuked the devil for twisting the scripture.

Psalm 91 is called the “911 Psalm” to remind you to go to it with emergencies.  Do that!  It is full of truth and hope and powerful words to pray and claim for any situation.  But God still holds us responsible to interpret scripture as honestly and accurately as we can.

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Choose Courage. Psalm 91.

This week (March 12, 2020) has been unprecedented. We have previously lived through hurricanes and floods and the associated hysteria. But I cannot recall anything to match the worldwide fear created by the Coronavirus pandemic. Just a few minutes of television, radio, or internet, and you’re convinced we are all going to die—and that those who survive will face an economic depression to rival that of the 1930s.

Courage remains a choice. Choose courage. Choose hope. Choose faith. Jesus is still the Prince of Peace. It can be hard when everyone around you is afraid. When everyone else is DIS-couraged, how can you stay courageous? By fixing your eyes on Jesus. Stop listening to the words of the anxious and panicking and listen to the words of the Prince of Peace.

Consider Psalm 91. I am going to shorten it, focusing on what the Psalmist has to say about diseases, epidemics, and pandemics—all of which are covered by the older words “plague” and “pestilence.”

If you dwell in the shelter of the Most High

You will abide in the Shadow of the Almighty.

Say to the Lord, ‘You are my refuge and my fortress,

My God, in whom I trust!’

For it is He who delivers you from the deadly pestilence.

You will not be afraid of the terror by night,

Of the pestilence that stalks in the darkness.

A thousand may fall at your side,

And ten thousand at your right hand,

But it shall not touch you.

Because you have made the Lord your refuge,

Even the Most High your dwelling place,

No evil will befall you,

Nor will any plague come near your tent.

For He will give His angels orders concerning you,

To guard you in all your ways.

[God says about you] ‘Because he has loved me, I will deliver him;

I will be with him in trouble;

I will rescue him and honor him.

I will satisfy him with long life

And let him see My salvation.’

Psalm 91 (edited).

Read Psalm 91 and talk to God about fear.

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The Moment in the Cave.

This morning as I considered spraying washer fluid on my windshield to “encourage” a tailgater to back off, it came to me:

HERE’S THE GREATEST RULE IN ETHICS:

“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” Luke 6:31.

Are we following that standard?  Some politicians follow a different ethic: “Attack your enemies before they attack you.”  Some go further: “Attack your allies before they have a chance to become enemies.” 

What would King David do?

Saul wanted to kill David for years.  He threw spears at him.  He chased him all over Israel. He killed 85 priests AND the entire city of Nob (men, women, children, and animals) to punish them for harboring David.  Then in a lonely mountain cave, God delivered Saul into David’s hands.  While David and his men were hiding deep in the cave, Saul entered to relieve himself.

Everyone was whispering:  “Now’s your chance, David!  Kill him now!  It must be God’s will!  That’s why God brought him here!”

David stealthily cut the edge off Saul’s robe, but refused to touch the evil king.  After Saul left the cave, David came out, bowed to the ground, and showed Saul the fabric:

“My lord the king!… The Lord handed you over to me today in the cave … but I took pity on you and said, ‘I won’t lift my hand against my lord, because he is the Lord’s anointed.’ Look and see that … I haven’t sinned against you even though you are hunting me down to take my life.  May the Lord take vengeance on you for me, but my hand will never be against you” 1 Samuel 24:8-12.

David followed the Golden Rule.  David respected God’s anointing on Saul—and He trusted God’s timing.  He understood “‘Vengeance is mine’ sayeth the Lord” (Deuteronomy 32:35 and Romans 12:19).

What about you? When God brings you your moment in the cave, what will you do? Can you leave vengeance in God’s hands? Can you trust Him to fight your battles?

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When Friends Become Enemies.

Have you watched relationships change? It’s amazing when an enemy becomes a friend.  That is the greatest feeling, a debt converted to an asset.  I’ve seen a few of my “enemies” become friends over the years, and it is so satisfying.

But when it goes the other way, it is devastating.  When people you love stop loving you for no reason—THAT HURTS.  It hurts so much.

When Saul met David the “courageous warrior, eloquent and handsome… SAUL ADMIRED HIM GREATLY, and David became his armor bearer” 1 Samuel 16:18,21.  When David killed Goliath, “Saul kept David with him from that day on” 1 Sam. 18:2.  David began leading troops and “was successful in everything Saul sent him to do” v.5. 

But Saul began to feel threatened: “Saul was afraid of David because THE LORD WAS WITH DAVID, BUT HAD LEFT SAUL….  David continued to be successful because the Lord was with him.  When Saul observed that David was very successful, HE DREADED HIM” v.12,14-15. Eventually, Saul convinced David to become his son-in-law.  So they became family—LITERALLY.  And Saul asked both his daughter Michal, and his son, Jonathan, to betray David, but the two loved him, leaving Saul to spend the rest of his life on a quest to murder David.

David ached over his broken relationship with the king. No one was ever a more loyal servant than David was to Saul—even after Saul tried to kill him. David was absolutely loyal and honorable, yet Saul always believed the worst about him.  So what did David do? He took it to God. Psalms 69 and 109 contain great words about the hurt Saul caused David (and that Judas would later cause Jesus).

“With words of hatred they surround me. They attack me without cause. In return for friendship, they accuse me, but I am a man of prayer” Psalm 109:3-4.

Jesus has been there.  He was betrayed by a close friend. He knows how it feels. Read Psalm 69 and 109 and let him share your hurt.

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Homosociality. Proverbs 18:24.

Homo what? There’s an odd term. Homosociality means “same-sex relationships that are not of a romantic or sexual nature, such as friendship, mentorship, or others.” Think about your best friends, teachers, and coaches—some of these are powerful, intense relationships with members of the same sex. But they are not sexual, merely “social.” Thus, “homosocial.”

The Bible includes several intense “homosocial” relationships: Jesus and His disciples, for example. These 13 men traveled the road together for three years, in the sun, wind, and storms, plodding along in the sand, sailing on the sea, eating over camp fires, sleeping under the stars, and talking about everything under the sun. Jesus poured His life into these men. He shared secrets with them. He loved them.

Another intense homosocial relationship exists between David and Jonathan. These two men loved each other and were not afraid to say so.

“The soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as himself…. Jonathan made a covenant with David, and stripped himself of his robe and gave it to David, with his armor, including his sword and his bow and belt.” 1 Samuel 18:1-5.

Later, the two men realized they had to part because Jonathan’s father Saul was trying to kill David. “David and Jonathan kissed each other and wept, though David wept more” I Sam. 20:41. They never saw each other again. When Jonathan was killed, David lamented:

“How the mighty have fallen! I grieve for you, Jonathan, my brother. You were such a friend to me. Your love for me was greater than the love of women.” 2 Sam. 1:26. (These are strong words, but it is clear that even with—or because of—his 700 wives, David does not seem to have had any good relationships with women.)

The Bible supports the truth—you can have strong, intense relationships with friends of the same sex. Pray—ask God for wisdom about those relationships.

“A man of too many friends comes to ruin, but there are some friends who stick closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24.

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David’s Secret.

How did David have the courage to face Goliath? David was POSITIVE he would kill this man who was ten feet tall. David was so confident, he persuaded Saul to risk everything on David—not a soldier, but an untested boy. How was he so sure?

David had previously killed lions and bears when they snatched lambs. Who does that for sheep? And to grab their fur and kill them without bullets? What was David’s secret?

I don’t think even David knew at the time. But the text says it over and over: “The Lord was with David” (see 1 Samuel 16:13, 18; 18:12,14,28.) David was anointed by Samuel. “So Samuel took the horn of oil, anointed him… and the Spirit of God took control of David from that day” I Sam. 16:13.

That day God changed his life. God CALLED him to these battles. David had the confidence that ONLY comes from hearing the voice of God. When God calls you, He gives you ‘un-doubtable’ confidence. That is why this young man with no sword, shield, or armor, could run to the battle and attack Goliath. And look at this bold speech!

“You come to me with a sword, a spear, and a javelin. But I come to you in the Name of the Lord of Hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have taunted. This day the Lord will deliver you up into my hands, and I will strike you down and remove your head from you. And I will give the dead bodies of the army of the Philistines this day to the birds of the sky and the wild beasts of the earth, that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel.” 1 Samuel 17:45-47.

Do you ever lack confidence? Beg God to lead you! Once God speaks and calls you to His plan, you may never doubt again! But He won’t speak until He knows you are willing to obey. Pray. Lay all your options down before Him. He will show you which to choose.

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Is it Better to Release Emotions or Hold Them in?

Is it better to release emotions or hold them in? That depends on the context. 

“There is … a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance” Ecclesiastes 3:4. 

A memorial service is a good time for weeping, but if the county judge were to weep during a press conference before the hurricane comes ashore, it might convey the wrong message. 

Though both sexes do it, men seem to have a special ability to compartmentalize.  You pack your trauma away in a mental cabinet somewhere, close the door, and return to the task at hand.  There is value in that: when your buddy is gunned down next to you on the battlefield, you ignore the emotions, close the door on the problem, and keep fighting.  It’s a critical survival mechanism.  But it is unhealthy.  Emotions packed away tend to fester.  This is an area where American men fail: we become so good at hiding from bad emotions, we lose touch with ALL emotions.  Cutting yourself off from grief can also cut you off from joy, hope, and love, until all you feel is the hopeless ache of depression.

It does not have to be this way.  King David was a man’s man, right?  He killed Goliath, women sang songs about him, and he led Israel’s armies for forty years.  He killed so many men that God called him a man of bloodshed.  David’s masculinity was never in doubt.

But David was also a worshipper, a musician, and a poet.  He was tender, vulnerable, and real.  David knew that he could be a great champion for God AND a great lover of God’s people.  When Jonathan and David had to part ways, “he and Jonathan kissed each other and wept with each other, though David wept more” 1 Samuel 20:41. 

David expressed emotions.  He wrote about them, sang about them, and shed tears.  This hero of heroes never left emotions packed away.  In the right time and place, David released his emotions.

God, give us the courage to express our emotions appropriately.

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Your Young Years Are Critical.

The future kings Saul and David were so different.  Saul hid from the spotlight, complaining that he was from a clan of nobodies.  David welcomed the anointing and was fearless in the face of a ten-foot-tall Philistine with a spear so heavy normal men called it a beam.

Samuel anointed each man.  The Spirit of God “took control” of each man (1 Samuel 11:6 and 16:13) and God used each man.  But David was much more obedient and God blessed David far more than He did Saul.  Why?  What was different about the two?

I believe the difference was their early years.  We know little about Saul’s early days.  But David had been walking with God for years and had seen God do amazing things:

“Your servant has been tending his father’s sheep. Whenever a lion or a bear came and carried off a lamb from the flock, I went after it, struck it down, and rescued the lamb from its mouth. If it reared up to strike me, I would grab it by its fur, strike it down, and kill it.  Your servant has killed lions and bears. This uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, for he has defied the armies of the living God….  The Lord Who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine!” 1 Samuel 17:34-37.

Maybe Saul was like so many young people who think they can goof off for years and get serious about their faith after they grow up.  That is utterly stupid.  By God’s grace, David was not one of these foolish youth.  David walked with God as a child alone in the wilderness protecting a flock of sheep.  And because he was faithful, God demonstrated His power in David’s life over and over.  Consequently, David entered adulthood with a powerful faith resting on the foundation of a youth spent walking with God.

David entered adulthood with a powerful faith resting on the foundation of a youth spent walking with God.

“Remember your Creator in the days of your youth” Ecclesiastes 12:1.

Don’t waste another day NOT walking with God.

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